Self-Love, oh how my perception of self-love changed these last few weeks.
2018 has been so next level insightful for me till now I just can’t!
It all started with me setting a powerful intention, to step out of my comfort-zone every day. And I have been doing that, and I can say that it opens up a lot of beautiful things, and a lot of shit which is in my eyes still beautiful.
So let’s start with the fact that I’ve always been connected with the higher realms. It is natural for me to astral travel and see energies, frequencies, and vibrations. Totaly my normal, but with that comes life, and understanding and alignment, and inspired action.
And precisely there was my blockage, which held me into an infinity loop for years, and I just broke it!
Patterns, self-sabotage & infinity loop
I saw self-love as something physical and mental. I didn’t dive into the other layers of my being because I wasn’t looking in that direction.
For example, I always have been a giver, I gave away my power, my energy, my money. And at the end of the day, I was the one suffering from my own choices. So I became aware of the fact that I did that on a relationship level. So I worked on changing myself, my thinking my way’s.
And when that part was cleared away from my relationship/family level, I thought that I broke the pattern! Which was far from the truth. I just shifted my pattern into another layer of my life. And it took another form, which took me awhile to uncover but it came on to the same pattern. Me giving away my power and my energy.
I cleared, experienced peace, and it shifted again, that was my infinity loop.
Quantum Shifting my consciousness
This pattern started to shift when I opened myself up to my shadow realm and shadow aspects.” I did a video about that I will link it down below. ”
I started to work more intensely with the moon. Which opened up a whole lot of channels for me.
Insight into insight to download and channeling sessions came to me and I began to work with my mojo to expand my consciousness and quantum shifted it too! I astral traveled, received next level clearings from my bad ass soul team and star family which was crazy amazing!
I saw my patterns, my infinity loop on all layers and levels, and most importantly I knew WHY! For the first time, i understood my patterns, my self-sabotage, actions, and life. And all I could give myself was LOVE, Respect, Compassion and more LOVE.
There is an aspect of me that feels unworthy, she feels unworthy of receiving love from herself, she is scared to be herself. and to show her true nature because if she does that, she will be unsafe and not loved. Which result in me not making space for myself, i can think that i do it, but my feelings and emotions are saying something else. This is my core blockage which makes my pattern and it flows like a snake on all layers of my being and life. Being aware of this. gives me so much inner peace and clarity on so many levels this is such a beautiful process and i’m so gratefull!
A few limiting beliefs I found :
Showing up for myself is egotistical and who accepts egotistical people?
Loving myself to pieces will hurt other people and I don’t want to hurt anyone.
I need love and acceptance to survive
One important thing that I saw was that whenever She showed up in the form of feelings, emotions, beliefs, situations, I pushed her away. I ignored her, judged her, did not accept her, and did not LOVE her.
I learned that our shadow aspects just want to be a part of our soul again, in the light. And this process is crucial to go through to transmute the shadow back into the light.
That part of me which is in so much pain, wanted to tell me this for so many years, and I didn’t listen, well I am now!
I am aware AF and when she shows up I give her everything that she needs, I give her LOVE, show her respect, compassion and accept the fact that this is happening. And then I show her that we are amazing, and able to show up for ourselves, by aligning to my soul and take soul inspired action, even if it is uncomfortable.
Because nobody can do that except me!
That is next level self-love to ME.
Writing this was hard for me, and confrontational, but I did it anyway, I know that allot of you gorgeous souls can use my story to grow and gain awareness of your own life.
So thank you for reading I appreciate you!
Shadow work lifestream